Whod you bang
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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