Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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