Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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