This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
