her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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