Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
