ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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