Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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