There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
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