Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize
