dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
