we're chasing vodka with high fives
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
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