i think my mom watched the whole time
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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