One girl and one boy is just not enough.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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