Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
