Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Randomize