It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
