Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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