The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
