i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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