I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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