BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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