Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
