been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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