when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
