why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
