Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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