i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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