I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
