On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
