i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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