His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Is Oprah even human
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
