I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
