am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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