Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
