Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
