Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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