Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
