Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
