i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
