i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize