Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
