who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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