What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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