why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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