Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Even my vagina gasped.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
