when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
