it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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