so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize