Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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