I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
